All coming together

Cannot believe we are almost done with community. This whole experience has been something else, something I have never experienced before. It has taught me about what we as OT’s can do, how we are advocates for our clients, how we are advocates for the disabled. How we can be the voice to those who do not have a voice, or who think they do not have a voice. It has been an experience of learning to work with so many different people, my patience being tested to the absolute limit. I feel that having a one week break from community to go to Zim, was the best thing that could have happened to me. In the first two weeks of community, I felt so overwhelmed in being 4 students in this magnitude of community, filling the shoes of three blocks before us. It is something that I have learnt about myself this year, I always compare myself and freak myself out at the impending doom of the end result. Like how am I going to get ther? How am I going to be able to do what other people have achieved already. I need to learn that my experience is not going to be the same as someone else’s. It has happened to me in every single block except paeds, because that was my first block. I had no-one to compare myself to. And I achieved in that block. I loved every minute of it. Shows me something doesn’t it? I think I needed to learn these lessons for my years to come as an OT. That I need to invent myself, and not try and be someone else or try fill the shoes of other people but rather create my own path. I know that I have the passion and ability to do well. I just need that faith in myself. And again, another lesson hard learnt- I cannot do anything in my own strength. Praying for strength and peace that surpasses all understanding allowed for the ever resounding message that I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. How do we do anything without Him? So it’s been a 6 week learning period. It has been tough and challenging, but so exciting at the same time. I mentioned in one of my first blogs that I am so scared of not doing a lot in the community, or feeling like we are getting nowhere and I also said I know that in 6 weeks time we will look back and be like, wow- we really did do a lot. And today was one of those days. And even though we got verbal recognition for the amount we have achieved from various sources, we didn’t even need the verbal recognition from others to know that we have done well and that we have done a lot. And even small things that will go unnoticed means a lot to us, and its not only about the marks at this point, it’s a feeling of satisfaction knowing the things we have achieved. Today the OT’s from a special school came to see the crèche we had been working at, and like I said their praise was well received by our group, and it felt like all the tears and frustration of this block was worth it. Today I felt like an OT. Which is a great feeling! Today was also a day of mixed emotions... a young student at the day care passed away. The teachers heard today, and the tears and heartbreak was awful. A young life taken too soon. You could feel the change in the atmosphere at the day care almost immediately. I don’t think I’ll ever understand why these things happen; I had a good friend pass away 2 years ago at the young age of just 20. It still hurts today. And I will never understand. Today I was taken back to that hurt that I felt two years ago. I prayed a prayer once, and it changed my life forever. I prayed, break my heart for what breaks yours. It is in a worship song and I made it my own. It was a hard prayer to pray, as my heart hurts so easily for others as I feel the Father’s love for others. And I know it is a pin prick of the feeling He has compared to what I am feeling, for nothing can compare to His love. This news wasn’t easy for those in the day care. It was a hard day. And the day didn’t get any better after that when one of the other girls in the day care fell off her chair off the stage hitting her head against the cot. She didn’t hit it hard but she definitely had a huge fright. I saw it happen. I was so proud of my community group, The Awesome Foursome as we were calm and collected. It was sad when none of the teachers responded to the situation as we would have expected. But my group was amazing, two consoled her, as one checked that she wasn’t injured as one went to get sugar water to relieve the shock that she had experienced. We knew exactly what to do and we worked like a well oiled machine. Testament to how far we have come as a group. You truly do become like family when you spend so much time together. We drive each other crazy but I love this group. So today was a day of mixed emotions, followed by some deep thinking and reflections.